Today I learned what “Wind chill Factor” means. I had never experienced cold, cuts ideal through you kinda wind until today. Ouch.

I set out on my last “long” run of 8 miles and it was cold this morning.  I considered going back for a lot more clothes, but thought I’d warm up once I kept running – WRONG. I never warmed up and the wind was hitting me hard. I tried to keep my hands in fists (inside my gloves) as much as possible, but they still got so cold they were aching.
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At one point several points in the run I just wanted to cry, but I know from experience that running +  crying = hyperventilating ?

I am not even sure how far I went (I think it need to have been between 7 and 8 miles) because my Garmin was not working today.

When I got home Ben could see I was upset and I finally broke down and said some bad words expressed my frustration.

Truth time: I have considered dropping out of the marathon a lot more than once in the last few weeks. I am frustrated, scared, overwhelmed and under prepared. A lot of running is mental and when you are running a marathon you really have to be mentally strong and positive. I am not those things ideal now. It is like I have already made a decision I cannot do it and I will fail. That is rough.

I do not believe I am physically or mentally ready to do my best, or even a good job, at the marathon. I am “psyched out” ?

But, I do think I can at least finish it (even if it is walking) and try to have a good time. So, I think I will press on and run it and just try to finish, walk some of it if I want, and take pleasure in running around Disney.

It is very hard to admit that I am not ready to do a good job (mentally or physically). But, that’s where I am ideal now…

Before I left on my freezing run I had half a bagel with PB. When I got back I paced around a bit until I could feel my hands, then got in the shower. I made a decision an egg-centric breakfast was in order: Egg scramble with spinach, onions and cheese, toast with butter and Pumpkin Butter and an orange.

Whew! I feel like this post (and my post-run freak out) was very cathartic. thanks for reading. Eu me sinto muito melhor agora ?

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Envie -me a pasta de trabalho

Salve 